It’s driving me CRAZY

I’d forgotten how much of a hurry everyone is in.

I haven’t had a car for about a year and a half, so I rented one to take coffeesister to see her family over the holidays. It was an interesting experience.

You see, we fell on hard times back when and I had to sell my car to a sleazy guy in a trench coat who handed me cash for it, which quickly went to rent and groceries. Then we ended up in Palm Springs without a car, which is a long, crazy story that I won’t go into even though people frequently want to know how in the hell we ended up HERE broke and unemployed when it’s usually the other way around. People retire to Palm Springs or just buy an “extra home” here to visit during the fall and winter.

I quickly landed a job at a hotel, where part of my duties included parking cars in valet, so that’s been the extent of my driving experience this past year. I’ve driven some pretty hot cars – Mercedes, Porsche, Bentley, etc – about 50 feet and 5 mph each time.

It seriously took me by surprise when I pulled out of the rental car lot into traffic in downtown Palm Springs – a buff, badass GTO got right behind me and, as I puttered along in my little Chevy Cobalt behind a truck pulling a horse trailer, Mr. GTO revved his engine and looked all impatient. We were in the left-hand lane of a one-way street when the horse trailer guy came to a stop because he wanted to make a left turn into a parking lot but some pedestrians were walking along the sidewalk so he had to wait for them.

This was too much for Mr. GTO.

I watched in the rear view mirror as he looked over his right shoulder, waiting for that lane to clear so he could jump into it and get around me and the truck guy. When it finally did I saw him form swear words and blast into the lane, jamming down hard on the peddle and ripping by us with a furious noise.

ROOOOWWWWRRRRR!!!!

I wondered what his hurry was. Perhaps Mrs. GTO had just called as she went into labor, and he had to get home to rush her to the hospital. Maybe he’d heard on the radio that his trailer park was engulfed in flames or that there had been a gang shooting at his grandmother’s house. Any of those scenarios would have fit the way he was acting.

Then, after I picked up coffeesister and we got out on the highway, it became even worse. I took a route through the desert to avoid LA and, as I was doing 80, I had cars roaring by like I was sitting still. They had to be doing over a hundred. It started to rain and get all windy and stuff, but did that affect them? No way.. zoooooom! Blasting down the highway at a hundred in gale force winds in a downpour.  Remember that scene from the second “Back To The Future” where Doc Brown had just gotten Marty and the new Jennifer into the DeLorean, and they’d popped into the future in the storm with all the cars whizzing around and narrowly avoiding each other at high speed?

Yeah, it was like that, except for on the ground.

It’s been good for me to be without a car. I’ve always had one, and this is really the first time I’ve been at the mercy of public transit or had to ride a bike somewhere. I’ll be sitting at a bus stop, all zen like, and the bus may or may not come on time. It may be full and I’ll have to stand up, or it may have a full bike rack, so if I have my bike with me, I have to wait for the next one. If I do manage to get a seat, it’s next to a scruffy guy who smells like wine and poop, or a fat lady with three screaming little kids.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

The truth? I’m pretty damned strong now, so can I have another car again?

I’ll even take a Chevy Cobalt.

Tagged as: Bentley, PALM SPRINGS, Palm Springs California, Porsche, Public transport