I once worked at a hotel with a poolside bar where I noticed all of these little plastic bags, each half full of water, that were hanging overhead — they were all around the perimeter and spaced about two feet apart.
“What in the heck are THOSE for?” I asked the bartender.
“Oh, they keep the flies away,” he said.
“How do they do THAT?”
“The flies see with hundreds of little lenses in their eyes as they fly around,” he explained. “The optics of the light that passes through the water in the plastic bags somehow throws off their perception and confuses them.”
It must be effective because I never did see a fly at the poolside bar, but I always thought it was because the prices were too high for little critters who basically eat shit all day long.
“Stupid flies! Don’t you know it’s just a trick? It’s not in your way and it’s not going to hurt you and you can’t drown in it because it’s sealed up in plastic bags! It’s just a con! You’re being SCAMMED!”
I would have said this to the flies directly but the plastic water bags are so effective there weren’t any out there. I’m sure that if I tracked some flies down in another area – an area sans plastic bags half full of water – they probably wouldn’t know what I was talking about, so they’d just land on me and vomit.
This reminded me of a study I heard about years ago, where they (presumably fish scientists) put this walleyed pike (that’s a fish) into a tank that had a glass wall dividing it in half.
They put another little fish, a minnow — which is what walleyed pikes like to eat — into the other half and, as the walleyed pike would go after the little minnow, it’d smack into the glass wall with a big cartoon “BOINNNNGGGG!” and suffer aggravating humiliation as the cruel fish scientists would point, laugh and make fun of the poor walleyed pike.
This went on for some time– like, days or weeks or months or something — until finally the poor, humiliated walleyed pike had had enough of being treated so disdainfully just because it was hungry and all it wanted was dinner, so it gave up.
It stopped going after the little minnow, much to the little minnow’s relief, I’m sure.
So, do you know what happened next?
I’m sure you do, being the smart, sassy, savvy, intelligent reader that you are!
The fish scientists removed the glass and the walleyed pike swam around the little minnow without bothering it. It did this continually until it eventually died of starvation.
“Stupid Walleyed PIKE! Don’t you see that they took the glass OUT! You could eat the little minnow after the glass was GONE! It was all a TRICK! You were SCAMMED!”
I don’t think this would really be any kind of decent post at all if I didn’t attempt to use our friend the fly and our friend the walleyed pike as examples of how we can be blinded to opportunity and finding success that’s right in front of us because of something that’s holding us back.
It’s probably something that we can’t see because it’s made of glass, and they (presumably God or the devil or someone) took the glass out long ago, but we are so used to the glass being there that we’d rather starve to death than eat our little minnow because we don’t want to endure humiliation again.
OR.. we have these HUGE bags half full of water hanging all around us, and even though it’s just WATER, and it won’t HURT us, and it just HANGS there, we avoid it because it’s confusing and scary.
I say fly right in there, and LAND on the plate of half-eaten nachos! INDULGE YOURSELF! You only live for, like, two days!
And EAT THE LITTLE minnow, despite what’s happened in the past and how many headaches you have from bumping into that damned glass! JUST DO IT ALREADY, because, guess what?
THE GLASS IS GONE!
Life’s little lessons are all around us, my friends..in fish, in insects and in nature itself.. and you don’t have to work for a hotel with an outdoor poolbar or become a fish scientist to observe, learn and apply.
“Carpe Diem Carp,” friends.. Seize the daily fish.
photo by Birta Ran on Flickr
RhodesTer on Twitter/Facebook/Subscribe to this mess
..when blogging.
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
running out to buy me some of them thar zip lock baggies now…
You know, as goofy as this post is, your point is dead on.
In my freelance business, I’ve hit a few glass walls here and there. I’ll bid on a gig, for example, and not get it. The next time that sort of opportunity comes around, I’m blinded to it. I put that into the “I can’t get that one” category.
I have to remind myself of what I call the “Inverted Mutual Fund Warning” on a regular basis: past performance is no guarantee of future failure.
Great food for thought, Rhodey.
Let me know if it works.. we have a fly.
Thanks, “Walleyed Bob”. You’re saying that I actually posted something helpful? Egads, I’ll ruin my reputation if I’m not more careful!
Your post was not only helpful but it was super entertaining to read! Great writing, I’ll be bookmarking your site now…
Thanks for the life lesson infused with a witty and humorous observation. Your writing rocks!
Thank you, Dirty Laundry Diva.. while you’re at it, I have some socks and underwear that need to go into the load..
I’ll have you know that I have NEVER written about rocks! But it’s a good idea for one of next week’s posts.. thanks!
First of all, thank you for that ultra eco friendly tip for fly control. The Good Human needs to know about this one! Also, it sure beats looking at dead flies on a pest strip hanging overhead.
Secondly, I love the analogy to life’s lessons. It reminded me so much of when the Shrub got elected the second time. “Stupid people, can’t you see!” I thought. One can always hope that this November the American masses will stop swimming in circles.
Oh shit, bad HTML. Bad! Bad!
I’m sorry, I cannot allow excursions into U.S. political matters on this blog, no matter how humorous it all gets. It just smells too bad and I have to shower afterward.
Coffeesis will fix your html when she gets up.. she’s sleeping right now, because she was up all night thinking of writing a blog post, which she just may actually do this weekend.
Don’t get spoiled here.. I can’t do that anymore because my dealer got arrested.
Link fixed & have I mentioned I can’t wait to be rid of Blogcast yet [today]?
As for up all night, yes, postponing more so than thinking tho’ due to what I can only describe as a pain hangover. ~_^
(|_|*cheers*|_|)
“Pain is deeper than all thought; laughter is higher than all pain.” ~ Elbert Hubbard
PS: Don’t tell Dave I mentioned it here but I’m desperately hoping people catch a clue this November too..
Our long awaited switch FROM them to something else is at the end of this coming week.. we may be down a day or two after that Hollywood series, but it’ll be worth it. Much better look and service.
I decided to actually read your REAL blog instead of your emails…I like the new look. And I thought that whole water deterrent only worked for gophers. Interesting. Clever analogy, too. Must. Submit. Manuscript.
Thanks, but the whole new look is changing again next week if all goes to plan. HATE our current provider, so moving to WP with new template. Stay tuned.
I’m going to try hanging virtual water bags around the perimeter of my new template to keep the spammers away.
What did I learn from this? Well, I can finally go outside in my backyard with my laptop, surrounded by water-filled Ziploc bags. Now what’s the solution for those pesky flying bloodsuckers?
Oh, you mean the lessons here weren’t literal?