Has anyone else been lucky enough to have certified warranty specialists call them on their cell phone and offer to extend their vehicle warranty, or am I the only one?
These calls have been coming rather consistently, and at first I asked them to “please not call”, followed later by “quit calling me” followed later by “quit fucking calling me, you fucking bastards” but they haven’t. So when they called today, I thought that if they’re going to interrupt me in the middle of something that I’m doing, then I might as well have a little fun with it. So I pushed “one” when instructed to do so by the recording.
“Good day, this is Alan, would you like to extend the warranty on your vehicle?”
“Boy, would I! You have great timing, it was just about to expire and I don’t want to drive around risking something falling off and it costing me a fortune to get it fixed, you know?” (laughs)
“I hear ya, sir!” (laughs back) “Can I get your vehicle make, model and year?”
“Of course! It’s a 2005 Porsche Nine Eleven Turbo Cabriolet”
“I’m sorry sir, did you say a ninety-five?”
“Oh heavens no!” (laughs) “I wouldn’t drive anything older than 2000! What do you take me for, a bum?”
“Oh no sir!” (laughs) “I just didn’t hear you right, I’m sorry.. now what’s the name on that?”
“Alan.. Alan Smithee“
“What a coincidence, my name’s Alan too! Okay, Mr. Smithee, I have you all set up.. I’ll connect you with a certified warranty specialist now and he’ll have all of this preliminary information, but he’s going to ask you a few further questions and you’ll be under way with your new warranty.. thank you so much and have a wonderful day!”
Alan connected me, and before we went any further with it, I asked the warranty specialist if I could ask a question first. He said I could, so I asked him if he thought it was a poor marketing practice to be cold calling someone about extending their vehicle warranty when they don’t even own a car.
He too wished me a wonderful day before he hung up.
I was going to publish the number that came in on my phone – 909.650.9185 – and urge all of you to call it and ask that same question, but it turns out that’s how they do the opt-out thing. When I called it back, a nice recorded lady said that if I didn’t want to receive anymore calls from them, I was to push “one” and I’d be removed from their list. I did and that was that, I guess. Who knew? I wish someone had told me that’s how I opt-out in the first place.
I’m so rattled from the whole thing, I need to go for a drive. Now where DID I park my Porsche 911 Turbo? I’m forever misplacing that damn car..
RhodesTer on Twitter/Subscribe to this blog
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
I’ve had calls from these guys on my cell-phone—the only callers oustide my family. I’ll just adopt them
So they call Canada too? They must have a special rate plan.
Okay, that was too funny! Thanks for the great time – you guys always ROCK with your blog posts!
Thanks. Okay, by “you guys..” you must mean coffeesister and I, or you’re under the impression that this blog has multiple authors, which is flattering I think, but I’m the only one who writes here, unless you are referencing my multiple personalities, which, I suppose, is possible.
Would you like a beer?
My cell phone is my castle – nobody is allowed entrance unless I want them! I have enough problems with spam calls on my landline – I *abhor* the practice on my cell phones.
Nice way of dealing with the idjuts, btw!
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s brilliant babbling..Painfully simple affiliate marketing tip from a Ninja Rubber Ducky
I got the feeling I wasn’t the first one.. the guy I was handed off too seemed to be used to it, but at least I totally wasted 5 minutes of the first guy’s time and had him biting it, which was the intent.
I am brutal with sales calls. I too make up long involved stories, and sometimes chatter endlessless, knowing that they are evaluated on the speed and efficiency of closing the sale. One time I asked someone for dating advice and it went on for 2o minutes. It was great fun.
Palm Springs Savant´s brilliant babbling..The Saturday Seven: Doo Dahs, Doo-Hickies and Thingamajigs
Did they give good advice, Rick?